Not another BLONDE joke

[John9362]

A  Blonde's Year in Review ...January 
Took new scarf back to  store because it was too tight.

February   
Fired from pharmacy job  for failing to print labels.....
Helllloooo!!!.......bottles  won't fit in printer !!!

March   
Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months..... box said "2-4  years!"

April
Trapped on escalator for  hours .... power went out!!!

May   
Tried to make  Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....

8 cups of water won't fit into  those little packets!!!

June
Tried to go water-skiing.......couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July   
Lost breast stroke  swimming competition.....learned later,
the other swimmers  cheated, they used their arms!!!

August   
Got locked out of my car in rain storm......
car swamped because soft-top was open.

September   
The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October
Hate M&M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November 
Baked turkey for 4 1/2  days ...

instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh  108!!

December   
Couldn't call 911 .....  "duh".....there's no "eleven"
Button on the stupid  phone!!!


THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde

female neighbour came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.

She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.

A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again,

opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again,

marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" 

To which she replied, "There certainly is!" 



(Are you ready? This is a beauty...)





My  stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL!" 

LOVE you guys !!

John

[Vangie]

I just told my hubby that last one, and he asked me did I get the mail yet.  I'm not a blonde either.    Ouch!

[gmik]

 

[Sue Creamer]

John,

I love blonde jokes....!!!   I got such a kick out of your post.  I am a blonde by the way and I have done some really really stupid things in my life, some that would make some of these jokes look tame in comparison....ha ha....and I still do!!!! 

Thanks for the post..
peace
Sue Ann

[gmik]

I have been telling the "JUly" one to all my girlfriends.  It is classic!!!

[John9362]

Hi Sue Ann,
You say: I have done some really really stupid things in my life, some that would make some of these jokes look tame in comparison..
Would you like to share some with us  Oh....go on just a few 

Love you guys !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Dennis Vogel]

My favorite blond: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRSU3cUEbes

[Sorin]

"... this is not my sandwhich!"   

rofl!

[Sue Creamer]

Ok, you asked for it John, here are two "mild" ones....

I once dialed my own secretary at my office (believing I had dialed one of my vendors) and when she told me there was no "Roy" at that number...I argued with her until she recognized my voice and said "Sue??? is that you".....I hung up.   I also answered the phone upside down one day and was hollering at the top of my lungs at the person on the other end that there must be a bad connection because I couldn't hear them....!  Pretty bad isn't it....  he he he 

Just think what my husband has to live with...!!!   he he he
peace,
Sue Ann

[John9362]

Very funny Sue Ann, thanks for sharing  ..........LOL !!