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Author Topic: Men are happier  (Read 3818 times)

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KristaD

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Men are happier
« on: May 19, 2008, 11:06:50 PM »

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife . You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.


No wonder men are happier.
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winner08

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2008, 03:38:17 AM »

I'm a man and I have to say close but no cigar. Car mechanics lie to men also. Most men have a little class and won't go to the bathroom anywhere. New shoes do blister or cut up our feet, also I don't know anything about tanks. For myself I'm very concern about wrinkles in my clothes. I don't know about wearing shorts it depends on how my but looks in them LOL ;D ;) ;)But most of it was true. It was funny. ;D :D

                                                   Darren

                             
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Dennis Vogel

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2008, 11:05:19 AM »

I tried smiling at the traffic cop but still got the ticket.
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Roy Monis

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2008, 01:33:32 PM »

I'm a man and I have to say close but no cigar. Car mechanics lie to men also. Most men have a little class and won't go to the bathroom anywhere. New shoes do blister or cut up our feet, also I don't know anything about tanks. For myself I'm very concern about wrinkles in my clothes. I don't know about wearing shorts it depends on how my but looks in them LOL ;D ;) ;)But most of it was true. It was funny. ;D :D

                                                   Darren

                             

Hi! Fellars

Don't believe a word of it, this is my experience for what it's worth.



God bless.

Love in Christ Jesus.

Roy UK       "The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love."   1Jn.4:8
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Craig

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #4 on: May 22, 2008, 11:56:34 AM »

Quote
Well Craig see what you started!!!!!   lets have a blasting of the sexes  no thank you  its mean spirited and besides Jesus was male and female

Well Peggy sorry if you were offended but I suspect Jesus/God has a sense of humor also.  How else can you explain the platypus or ant-eater? ;D ;D





Craig

Who wishes the whole world would not take itself so seriously, and allows political correctness to take away a good laugh.
"A sense of humor is a terrible thing to waste" :D
« Last Edit: May 22, 2008, 12:02:05 PM by Craig »
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Dennis Vogel

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2008, 12:05:56 PM »

Well Craig see what you started!!!!!   lets have a blasting of the sexes  no thank you  its mean spirited and besides Jesus was male and female        its difficult on both sides and wonderful on both sides  the best years of my life was having and raising my children and working with my husband at our business.  Now my husband is ill and we had to stop our business and the children grew up went to college   we sure miss that wonderful time God gave us and the wonderful little children we had and we had 6 rug rats.  My husband worked hard  six days a week and I worked right beside him as much as I could   if I wasn't with him I was with the children or doing something for the family 
each night we tried to sit down with the kids and read the Bible and pray    sometimes it took and hour and a half every one had so much to say   about their day   many nights as we were praying I would look over my beautiful family and see my husband sleeping   dead tired from working so hard   he  wasn't  perfect by a long shot and either was I    but we did something together and that was raised the children and had a life together   and it was Good    love peggy

Peggy, are you serious? Blasting the sexes? We are different. Our brains are wired differently. Is it wrong to make fun of ourselves?

The best years of your life may be behind you (and maybe not) and perhaps you're in no mood to make light of anything because of your current situation. But this is most certainly not mean spirited.

Dennis

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Roy Monis

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #6 on: May 22, 2008, 12:56:44 PM »

Quote
Well Craig see what you started!!!!!   lets have a blasting of the sexes  no thank you  its mean spirited and besides Jesus was male and female

Well Peggy sorry if you were offended but I suspect Jesus/God has a sense of humor also.  How else can you explain the platypus or ant-eater? ;D ;D





Craig
 


Who wishes the whole world would not take itself so seriously, and allows political correctness to take away a good laugh.
"A sense of humor is a terrible thing to waste" :D

Hi! Craig

Are you taking the Micky out of me? That there sitting on his tail is ME!

God bless you.  Of course we need a laugh, ask KristaD what she thinks?

Love in Christ Jesus.

Roy UK      "The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love." 1Jn.4:8


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LittleBear

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2008, 01:54:10 PM »

Well, Krista....after all, God DID provide a helper for Adam.  God knows they need all the help they can get!



Ursula
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carol v

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2008, 03:39:11 PM »

The first time I really noticed God's infinite sense of humor was the day, several decades ago, that I drove out to the lake in my little Datsun sports car with my 3 boxers for a walk. Boxers love varmints. They chased down a skunk and all three got a direct hit in the face. I had no choice but to load them all back in my little sports car and drive them to town -- WITH MY HEAD HANGING OUT THE WINDOW. I knew God was laughing.

I once had a war between 2 boxers, a skunk and a porcupine inside my yard and guess who won hands down. I had to call a "country vet" to come out and take the quills out on site because the smell was just too bad. I think the skunk just skulked off and bled to death somewhere. The porcupine, well, he just waddled off.

I guess God created skunks to make us appreciate flowers and He created porcupines to keep the skunks humble. He must have created boxers to give the skunks and porcupines something to do because they sure have been busy with my boxers over the years.

Carol
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Beloved

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2008, 05:56:05 PM »

One easter I was on my way to a conference and my truck broke down, it was the fan belt. Three guys at the truck stop tried to put it on, they could not and gave up. I sat and waited until the mechanic came and decided to try myself. It was interesting. I finally figured it out, you had to twist the belt before trying to put down into the engine and then  over the gears.

When I finally got it, I was covered in grease, but I realized...hey ...THAT is what you guys feel...it was a great moment..I went and checked into a swanky hotel but I was grinning ear to ear.  This thing that I was feeling though a woman ...was definitely....  a man thing.

Women are sensual, think in the future and think relationally and use both sides of their brains. 
Men are motor and more task oriented think more logically and in the present.
neither is more superior in all situations, sometimes one works better than the other, sometimes you even need two working a problem.

You need BOTH types in a relationship.

These male vs female funnies do show the extremes though.


Beloved
« Last Edit: May 23, 2008, 08:35:08 PM by Beloved »
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KristaD

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2008, 08:12:44 PM »

So very true Beloved ;).
Peggy, I am so sorry for your situation right now and that my post upset you. I am 25 and very much in love with my husband and enjoying raising our babies and making a life together, and I dread the day that it's all over. I am sorry that you are not at a point in your life where you can see the innocent humor in something like that joke and I am deeply sorry that it offended you and made you feel that you needed to defend your husband, I assure you I meant nothing bad about him and he sounds like a wonderful man. If I post any more I will put a notice at the top that some may find the content offensive so that you can avoid potentially hurtful things like that.
Praying for you, with love Krista.
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Dennis Vogel

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #11 on: May 27, 2008, 10:40:15 PM »

Quote
the abused that is joked about with pictures on this site

Did I miss something? What abuse jokes and what abuse pictures.

Dennis
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rk12201960

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #12 on: May 28, 2008, 12:31:34 AM »

Greetings and peace to all.
It would be wise to look at our Lords words in such matters.
Matthew 18;20-35

I've used this wisdom to get over many hills and it still works.

Randy
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cjwood

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #13 on: May 28, 2008, 05:35:36 AM »

I tried smiling at the traffic cop but still got the ticket.


now THAT'S funny dennis. made me laugh out loud.

thanks,
claudia
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Dennis Vogel

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #14 on: May 28, 2008, 09:02:05 AM »

   
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Still no idea what you are talking about Peggy? And I'm not about to try and find these posts and try and figure out what you find offensive. Way too busy for that.

How about you quote what you don't like, then explain why you don't like it to me?

Dennis
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KristaD

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #15 on: May 28, 2008, 12:43:51 PM »

WOW! Peggy you really, really, truly misunderstood my apology. It was heartfelt and sincere and I am sorry that you did not feel that. I'm not going to continue this b/c I am obviously just upsetting you further but I wanted to let you know that I was not in any way trying to be nasty or fake (that's not me) and that you have JUDGED me wrongly. I apologize again for offending you twice now. I also don't understand what you mean about joking about women being abused?? But perhaps if you are not of the mind right now to see humor in jokes, and you are taking offense at them, it would be best to avoid them all together rather than jump on people who post them for other's to have a laugh. Again I am sorry.
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musicman

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #16 on: May 28, 2008, 09:58:36 PM »

The first time I really noticed God's infinite sense of humor was the day, several decades ago, that I drove out to the lake in my little Datsun sports car with my 3 boxers for a walk. Boxers love varmints. They chased down a skunk and all three got a direct hit in the face. I had no choice but to load them all back in my little sports car and drive them to town -- WITH MY HEAD HANGING OUT THE WINDOW. I knew God was laughing.

I once had a war between 2 boxers, a skunk and a porcupine inside my yard and guess who won hands down. I had to call a "country vet" to come out and take the quills out on site because the smell was just too bad. I think the skunk just skulked off and bled to death somewhere. The porcupine, well, he just waddled off.


I guess God created skunks to make us appreciate flowers and He created porcupines to keep the skunks humble. He must have created boxers to give the skunks and porcupines something to do because they sure have been busy with my boxers over the years.

Carol

Boy, your boxers are pretty dumb.  Guess they've been punched in the head too many times.  I think even Mike Tyson would be a genius next to them.
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carol v

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #17 on: May 29, 2008, 12:59:53 AM »

Haha musicman. Yes, my boxers aren't that smart. They see a small animal and just react. My vet has a picture of several dogs in his office full of quills. Love the dumb things anyway.

Carol
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joyful1

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Re: Men are happier
« Reply #18 on: May 29, 2008, 04:58:31 AM »

I guess God created skunks to make us appreciate flowers and He created porcupines to keep the skunks humble. He must have created boxers to give the skunks and porcupines something to do because they sure have been busy with my boxers over the years.
Carol

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  LOLROFWT!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D
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