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Free Will Again
EKnight:
Okay, no such thing as Free will. God's will prevails. Does this imply that there is nothing one can feel proud about? I am having a hard time with this. Here is why:
My daughter and her boyfriend are sitting here playing a game and have pretty much been here all day. My daughter is 17 and about to graduate high school. By no means an honor student but a well behaved daughter. ALL of her girl friends (she does not) drink and smoke pot. Many of whom will be receiving scholarships at graduation. One of them is the President of SADD (students against destructive decisions) and not only drinks but has done some shameful things (I will not perpetuate them here). Resisting peer pressure is a major accomplishment especially these days. Having said all that, how can I not encourage her to continue on this path without patting her on the back. I don't think it is enough to say "well, God just did not will you to be like all of your friends, aren't you lucky". Doesn't she have the right to feel good about the positive choices she has made these past four years?
Eileen
rjsurfs:
Hi Eileen,
How about being thankful that God gave her the strength to make these choices and that he put circumstances in place to make it so? Remember too that Ray shows us that we do have the ability to make choices... we even have wills... they are just not wills that are ours freely without causality.
I know that you love your daughter for who she is... I don't see that as pride.
Bobby
Samson:
--- Quote from: EKnight on June 16, 2008, 10:07:27 PM ---Okay, no such thing as Free will. God's will prevails. Does this imply that there is nothing one can feel proud about? I am having a hard time with this. Here is why:
My daughter and her boyfriend are sitting here playing a game and have pretty much been here all day. My daughter is 17 and about to graduate high school. By no means an honor student but a well behaved daughter. ALL of her girl friends (she does not) drink and smoke pot. Many of whom will be receiving scholarships at graduation. One of them is the President of SADD (students against destructive decisions) and not only drinks but has done some shameful things (I will not perpetuate them here). Resisting peer pressure is a major accomplishment especially these days. Having said all that, how can I not encourage her to continue on this path without patting her on the back. I don't think it is enough to say "well, God just did not will you to be like all of your friends, aren't you lucky". Doesn't she have the right to feel good about the positive choices she has made these past four years?
Hello Eileen,
I think part of the point is that your good parenting was the cause that led to your Daughter's good choices. Ray says we make thousands of choices a day, some of which we aren't even conscious of, your patting your Daughter on the back and praising her would constitute a cause and her continued good efforts could be the choice resulting from the prior cause. According to Ray, the fact we didn't end up doing terrible things like Saddam Hussein's Son is resulting from the Grace of God. I't's good to remember that we aren't necessarily aware of why we made a certain choice, but that doesn't mean their wasn't one. The Cause and effect relationship is a Scientific fact, as brought out by Ray in his Audio Talk about Free Will, perhaps it might help you to listen to that again, I've listened to it 3 times and still gain insight that I didn't have the previous time I listened to it, the mind can only retain so much at one time. Also, he brings out the testimony of Scientists that support the idea that everything has a prior cause, it's Scientific fact, he also mentions the definition of Free Will in this Talk according to Dictionaries, for something to be the result of Free Will, their would be no prior cause. God himself would be an example of that, because he's the source of Causation. Yahweh (YHWH) literally means, He that causes to become, The First Cause.
Eileen Hope this helps, Samson.
--- End quote ---
Kat:
--- Quote from: EKnight on June 16, 2008, 10:07:27 PM ---how can I not encourage her to continue on this path without patting her on the back. I don't think it is enough to say "well, God just did not will you to be like all of your friends, aren't you lucky". Doesn't she have the right to feel good about the positive choices she has made these past four years?
--- End quote ---
As a mother it is your responsibility to "train up a child" (pro. 22:6). Your daughter is what God has put in your life so that you can train her up to know how to live right. This means you need to prepare; give instruction and discipline. These should be done in love to encourage her in the right direction. Not only is this giving her the needed instruction to know how to live, as a mother I have learned a tremendous amount from training my children. It is a big job to raise a child.
Feeling good about doing the right thing is not bad. But I think we have to careful about proud as it can be haughty or insolent attitude that we need to guard against. But give your daughter a pat on the back, she needs to know when she has done right, I would think that is a good thing. It's a balancing act we do to praise them when they are good, but not give them so much that they become cocky; overconfidence, conceited.
You sound like a good mom and your daughter seems to be on the right track :)
mercy, peace and love
Kat
EKnight:
Every time I think there is no solution that will pacify me, I come here and get such positive feedback. Yes, all of your answers have been helpful and I really appreciate you all taking the time to answer. Thanks!!!
Eileen
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