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A difficult post for me!

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Marlene:
Richard, You have been a blessing to me. I have not believed all this very long myself. I remember as a child thinking about god all the time. Never got to involved  into church till I was 26. The year before that I had an experience I never forgot. I was just married about a year. The lord was drawing him to me. I had sin I needed to repent of. I was about to cross a rail road track. I had a brand new 1979 Bonneville. I looked that train right in the light. Right before that I had heard you could not out run a train they never blew there whistle I did not even see it till I was on the track. It felt as if something lifted up my car and pushed be across the track. I could not stop crying. I knew it had to be gods protection on me. I was sitting at home one day and he came to me. When, my husband got home he thought I had gone mad. He said, "What is wrong with you. I then told him that I had spent the day with the lord. He, also believe that day. No, church was needed there. But, then we got into church thinking it was the right thing to do. Well, I have lots of health issues now. I was not able to go to church much. I started spending time like I use to before church one on one with the Lord.  I had a blood stream infection with 109 fever  and laid on a cooling blanket for a week. Fever around 107. Took 48 hours to find a antibiotic to help. Most people would be in a coma. Not me. He kept me awake for it all. There I really learned who was in control. After that I started questioning all of the churches beliefs. I went back to church but god had a plan for me to leave. All those months my minister never came to see me at home. When, I did go he started preaching about tithe I had so many medicals bills we could not pay it. I had to quit work. My second week back he  preached on tithe and said he did not know what anyone gave. That was his first mistake some had left because of that then he took the amount we gave each week and said it was not enough. He didnt know how much money my huband made. His first mistake was he lied up there his second was he said god might kill someone who robs god. Needless to say we never returned. I put in the word hell on the computer and up came Ray's website. So here I am. Through, it I realized I did not even know him from all the things church taught me. I repented cause as a child I knew he was love, I repented that I am sorry I didnt know your character after all the years you showed me love even when I sinned. There is a song called Broken and Spilled out I use to sing it, it says like a prisoner set free. Praise his holy name. I will never be the same or would want to. Just wanted to say you and everone on her is blessing to me. Also, I forgive that minister cause he does not know what he has done just like me. And, I will keep him in my prayers.
God Bless
Marlene

Richard D:
Marlene


Thank you for sharing you’re story with me. My heart goes out to you my friend. I can relate to what you’re telling me, it’s strange how God preserves us and then leads us to His truths.

You know, I always felt God presence in my life but something was just not right. I could never quite understand what it was, although I knew sin was and issue as I’m not perfect and subjected to error.

I would always ask God to forgive me for my sins but never really felt it. Sometimes I did but then I thought afterwards I was deceiving myself to think God would forgive me.

I would always remember that scripture ( If  you ask to be forgiven then Jesus is faithful and just to forgive ) I had difficulties believing this scripture because I was still dealing with a belief system that said God was going to send billions of people to hell basically.

So then I tried loving God because I knew if I did not love God he would send me there also. Then I started thinking if I love God to elude hell, God will see through me and send me there anyways because I don’t love Him but only fear Him.

I came to my end and simply ask God straight out, I said, Lord with all the different regions on earth how am I to know which one to believe. If I were born in the Middle East I would believe as they do or another place as they do there.

Just show me the truth please, is that too much to ask for. And Marlene, that’s when it happen ,one night I was on my computer and next thing I know, I’m reading Ray’s papers and after about five or six weeks of reading Ray’ papers I join the forum.

Now I’am starting to see through the world’s religious system realizing that Satan had done a number on me. But only now can I look back and see what the church has done to me.

Marlene, like me and everyone else here, God has lead you here also. Believe that because it’s true.

I’m happy for you Marlene that you are here now

 You’re friend and brother in our Lord and savior Jesus. Richard. God bless you sister.  :)

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