What i hate this most.. boy this touches me deeply.
I really hate all the pain and suffering, seeing people in the world with no hope, who don't even know what awaits them! I hate knowing that me, a most wretched and miserable man [and i say this with honosty, i am horribly carnal and wicked] can know the truth of God and yet all these people, God has not yet called. Why me? You know.. why me? What did i do, i'm nobody.. nothing great, i'm infact so unworthy it makes me stomach turn to think that i do know God and they don't.. its not fair.. it just isn't. I hate seeing pain, suffering, i hate it. I absolutely hate it, sometimes i cry.. when i see others crying or i hear the torment in their voices for the things they have suffered and all the while they are without hope because they know not God... or atleast they THINK their is no hope.. yet i KNOW their is and THEY SUFFER and i feel almost like its MY FAULT if i hadn't been here, maybe someoen else would know, and than maybe they wouldn't suffer as much...
One of the biggest reasons i want to become a doctor is because of this.. i want to HELP, i have to GIVE HOPE, I WANT TO LOVE as God loves. I want to HEAL all the pain and suffering in this world, make it go away, just go away... i want to cry out to God for everyone who doesn't have a voice..
I hate it.. i hate it i hate it, i hate the suffering, the pain, and the evil... HOW LONG OH LORD? How long... Please be with us all GOD PLEASE. We all need you very much..
Well thats my rant. This is a very big and touchy subject for me.
Love to you all in Christ,
Alex