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Hatred
firefly77:
Daddysgirl,
Forgiveness is often a process for me... I forgive mentally because God has forgiven me so much (how could I do less?); my heart takes a bit longer to "catch up". I think the hardest thing is to separate the "deed" from the person.
Just the other day I found out that a person who had deeply hurt me 11 years ago was going through a very agonizing time himself. I don't want to go into the details, but when I found out how much emotional pain he was in presently, I felt so much love and compassion for him that I wept; that's when I realized that I had truly forgiven him.
Daddysgirl:
Thank you all so much
I have been crying a lot today just thinking about the whole thing. The hardest part being that i might have to see this person more than i'd like to in the future(i really would not like to see him at all). He is the father of my baby, but i really do not consider him one coz he's made little to no effort to be involved in his life. Only does so when he wants to prove a point. The arrangement i'd rather have is that he disappears altogether! i love my son with all that i have(just pray i dont turn him into an idol of the heart, my heart) and i would not want him exposed to this self-absorbed person especially when i myself have enjoyed every benefit of having a "good" man for a father.
This issue is long and i wont get into it but it's so hard to live with this fact in my life.
Again, Thank you
Rene:
--- Quote from: kweli on October 23, 2008, 08:07:57 AM ---What she told me in that half an hour will probably do wonders for my spirituality. I saw so many obvious flaws in me that I couldn't believe I was so in denial. In a way, GOD used the situation to bring out the beast in me who sentences all those who wrong him to the pits of hell. If I did not have my eyes opened to that I'd still hate her, and anybody else who wrongs me (at least subconsciously).
--- End quote ---
Kweli,
You said a mouthful there. Thanks for sharing and being so honest.
René
Marlene:
DaddysGirl,
I tried for years to learn how to forgive people completely. Being hurt is not easy. I am sure having a child with him makes it hard. I know one time I had such hard feelings towards a person I started to hate myself. One night I through myself down and I said, "God I hate myself more then I do this person."
It came that night. But, it always gets harder and harder seems like the people we love the most can hurt us. I also, say Father Forgive Them They Know Not What They Do. I actually, think that can be true. Then I also think of my own flaws. Well, then the Beast shows up and that is not a pretty sight. Just rely on him , I know he will here your cry. I wish I could do or say more, but all I can do is pray for you.
In His Love,
Marlene
youthfortruth:
--- Quote from: Daddysgirl on October 23, 2008, 05:55:26 AM ---Hi all
I need your help. I have been fighting for months to forgive this one person. i finally thought i had, then this. maybe i shouldnt even go into details- they are far too depressing. But yesterday i had another encounter which made me realize that i still have a lot anger and despice and hatred toward this person.
I have never been able to hate any one person no matter what they did to me. I know with no linger of doubt that God is in control- i also believe that this person is doing what was predestined for him to do, I believe God and I know that i can of myself do nothing to get rid of this. I have tried and i cannot forgive him. I cannot even look him in the eye without wanting to spit out! i cry just thinking about how i am allowing this insignificant person(at least to me) to hinder my walk with God. How do i let it go inspite of all that he's continuing to do? How?
--- End quote ---
Daddysgirl,
Hi!
Despite the hard time your going through, I find it very commendable that hate isn't a word in your vocabulary. You made the statement in your post:
"I have never been able to hate any one person no matter what they did to me."
That attitude dangles in the minority it seems. In a situation like this, my best advise would be not only forgive him, but make it crystal clear about how he needs to change. I understand that's easier said then done, but lashing out with a clenched fist is by no means the best resort in solving a problem. As Ghandi once said:
"An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind"
This individual may not listen nor care about you. This individual may think your just a thorn in his side. Yet, when the unexpected arises in life, you must first do the courageous thing regardless of how hard it is. who know? maybe it'll change him in ways one wouldn't imagine
God bless you!!
-Andrew
"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you"
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