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[SandyFla]

These are actual bloopers that were printed in various church bulletins:

     * If you would like to know more about Moms in Ouch, call the church office.
     * Hymn #302: Set My Soup Afire
     * Bring him incense, golf and myrrh.
     * If you’re lost, get saved. If you’re backslidden, repeat.
     * If you would like to sign up, we have roosters in the the vestibule for a softball team.
     * Song 258: When We All Get To Heave (stand)
     * On All Saints Sunday, we remember important people in our lives with a special reading of the saints who have died during worship.
     * A big thank you to everyone who contributed to the Food Pantry. The bags are filled and marching out the doors.
     * The church orchestra is in need of more bras players for the upcoming Christmas presentation.
     * Communion: Sharing of the Bread and Cup (all followers of Christ are invited to participate after personal medication.)
     * Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person who want remembered.
     * The Spring Council retreat will be hell March 26.
     * The concert was a great success. Thanks to Pam who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual, fell upon her.
     * Hymn: God Is Exhausted
     * We will observe World Hunger Day next Sunday, and a rice and beans luncheon will be served immediately following the Morning Worship Service. That evening, we will make a joyful noise unto the Lord at our monthly Sunday singing.
     * Join the Senior Saints for their all-you-can-eat food barf.
     * Adult classes: There is no more “Living the Christ Life.” We are done with that.
     * Pray that the world will have more peas.
     * Pictures of broads will be taken for the pictorial directory on Sunday following the service.
     * You will find First Assembly a church the neuters and cares for its members.
     * Join us in the Fellowship Hall following the service for sandwiches and delicious chicken poodle soup.

[ames]

Sandy,
you have a great sense of humor. I really need to laugh out loud sometimes. I work on a computer all day and your last postings were some good comic relief.
Thanks A

[mongoose]

I would really like to hear Hymn #302....but I think I'll skip Song 258.   

mongoose

[SandyFla]

Sandy,
you have a great sense of humor. I really need to laugh out loud sometimes. I work on a computer all day and your last postings were some good comic relief.
Thanks A

Hi Ames, and welcome to the forum! I'm glad you liked my list. Those are the kinds of things that happen when you type a lot and proofread a little!
Sandy

[gmik]

 

Good Ones!

[ned]

I have a couple more to add...

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking at Calvary Methodist. Come and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict.

For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Love,
Marie

[SandyFla]

I have a couple more to add...

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking at Calvary Methodist. Come and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Hi Marie,

I LOVE that one! I wanted to add it to my list, but I couldn't find it. Thanks for posting it.

Sandy