Lately, I have been waging a battle in my mind/heart. Injustice is being done to me and others. And God doesn't move a finger. (As far as my eye can see) I sometimes think about the atheists' claim that 'turning the other cheek' is a way for those in authority and power to manipulate the minds of men and subjugate them. That to do this makes one weak, and thus a sure target for abuse.
I lose my temper; I utter profanities; I breathe murder. The very worst of me comes out! And I know that God Almighty is witnessing my behavior. To be like Christ! I simply cannot be! I cringe to think what I could be capable of. I have ruled out the possibility of being counted worthy to be in the first resurrection. How can I be when I react like this?
Why should I even keep trying when I already know the end result? I'm hopeless.
Hi theophilus,
Just because you are unaware of what God is doing does not mean He's not working something in you and others as well through the things that happen. We all have to go through the trials and tribulations of life and it is always for us to learn from it, but yes we will all need to reach a point of seeing ourselves as hopeless sinners. We are in a process of learning that 'we' cannot overcome these weaknesses of the flesh, it really takes time for us to change over from 'our' trying to fix things, to learning to trust God to do so in us. Our getting angry, shows we do not trust Him, but feel He has not done what we think He should have... we have to get over thinking we know best.
You can't expect a quick fix for these sins that have become habitual and engrained into a thinking, words and actions. Just hating these weaknesses that manifest in us, is the first step. If you continue to hate them enough and don't just give up, you should reach a point when you will actually began to catch yourself before doing/saying/thinking some of these things. This is a progression of recognizing these weakness of the flesh and slowly removing them one at a time, over time.
I really feel that we have to come to the very same place as Paul did and realize that we too are the worse of sinners.
1Ti 1:15 This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief.
I really believe that God will bring us all to realize and see that the sins in our own life would rank us right there with Paul as chief among sinners. And I feel it is a necessary part of the process, we have to see ourselves as being as lowly as any other human being before we would ever be able to rule over them with Christ in the next age.
The first resurrection is the greatest possible hope in this life, yes it is only God who determines who will be in it. But we can have evidence of that hope, if it is given to us to strive and never give up on the hope to be there.
Luke 13:24 "Strive to enter through the narrow gate, for many, I say to you, will seek to enter and will not be able.
Php 2:12 Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling;
v. 13 for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.
mercy, peace and love
Kat