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A question for the older men here
space.ace.jase:
Hi Alex,
I'm in my lates twenties and this too has always been a big shameful sin in my life.
None of us can stop sinning without the strength of God (which applies to all sins) and this thread is a good read http://forums.bible-truths.com/index.php/topic,11607.0.html.
Over time the guilt rises and I personally am finding that I want to do this less and less because the shame and guilt are outweighing the pleasure from it. I still fall but there has definitely been changes happening over the last 6 months for me.
As far as the forgiveness one thing to keep in mind is that God is not human. He has so much more forgiveness, compassion and understanding than we do so it's kind of silly to try and compare. He has not and will not abandon you Alex, he has you right where he wants you!
"Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you." Deuteronomy 31:8
Keep coming back to the word of God, there is so much encouragement in the scriptures. I had one of the worst days today where just everything went wrong but I know that this is all for a purpose. This scripture came to mind:
"for those whom the Lord loves He disciplines: and He scourges every son whom He acknowledges." Hebrews 12:6
Like Ray has said becoming saved is the hardest thing any human being will go through! Don't give up!
God bless,
Jase
Kat:
Hi Alex,
I'm going to risk coming into 'no womans land' to say something.
That is an act that involves self gratification, where you become so wrapped up in your own desires that everything else is blocked out and you are in your own little world. You must somehow find control from within yourself and where does that come from?
1Co 6:19-20 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit in you, whom you have of God? And you are not your own, for you are bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's.
You must realize that the Holy Spirit/Jesus Christ bares witness to these acts. Does this glorify God? Of course not. If everytime you begin to think in that direction, if you can begin to focus your thoughts on the fact that you are NOT doing these things in secret, but that the eyes of God your Savior are on you. Well then it may help to begin the long journey out of this addiction you have.
Job 34:21 He watches every step we take. (GNB)
So there you go, hope I did not intrude too much.
mercy, peace and love
Kat
Marky Mark:
Hi Alex,found this email...Rays response is spot on. ;)
Masturbation
« on: April 09, 2007, 04:28:56 PM »
I am a 19 year old male, living in ............... I have a problem that seems to me I will never get over. I have Had this problem since I was 13 and have been really fighting it for a couple years now, ever since Ive been saved. Holding off for a week and then doing it again, as hard as I try and not want to do it I just cant stop doing it. Ive prayed about it to God, and keep praying about it but it seems like my problem just takes control of me sometimes, I have been able to hold off for 2 weeks now, (the longest ever since the age of 13) but today I gave in to my flesh... my conscience does not even bother me anymore about this lust of the flesh anymore and that worrys me. My problem is masturbation and pornography, I want to stop doing these things because I know they are a lust of the flesh and I know doing them is a sin, and as a struggling Christian ;h ave a desire to serve God and let him take control of my life. I used to smoke pot and cigarettes, I also used to drink alot but have been able to stop those things without much struggle. But not masturbation and pornography. Your website has helped opened my eyes to many Biblical truths and I thank you and God for Bibletruths.com. Please I need ur help and ask u to tell me anything u can to help me get rid of this lust... May God Bless You and give u more wisdom and strength to uphold ur ministry. I pray for ur web site and you daily please pray for me also.
A Brother in Christ Jesus
To embarrassed to say my name...
Dear Embarrassed:
You are not alone out there with this particular pull of the flesh for sexual gratification. It is common among all men (and women to a somewhat lesser extent). It is GOOD that we should feel embarrassed over our sins. My past sins are an embarrassment to me when I from time to time think about them. If they were NOT an embarrassment to me, I might still be committing these same stupid and lustful acts. Embarrassment and guilt are good for us. These feelings first make us realize that these things are lustful, and wrong, and stupid. But we will not have victory over them unless and until God reveals to us their real purpose and need to get rid of them.
Where did the mechanism by which Eve: "saw that the tree was GOOD FOR FOOD, and that it was PLEASANT TO THE EYES, and a tree to be desired to MAKE ONE WISE..." come from in the first place? Did SHE create these desires in her heart and mind and soul? Get real--SHE HAD NOT A CLUE! God created humanity in the spiritually weakened state in which we find ourselves, but there is a great and grand reason and purpose for it.
There is a "SPIRITUAL GREATNESS" that is achieved by the conquering of illegal pulls [spiritually 'illegal'] of the flesh and the stupid sensual lust for self-gratification. These things are not good, in and by themselves, as modern psychologists might try to convince us, but they do serve a good purpose when they embarrass us and make us feel guilty. Embarrassment and guilt are the precursors to REPENTANCE.
We must come to the place in our lives where we not only desire to obey the laws of the land, the powers ordained by God to somewhat limit the evils of society, but to also obey the Laws of GOD. We want and desire to do what God says, not because we have figured out all the logical logistics of His commandments, but because we desire to OBEY HIM REGARDLESS of how well we understand all the reasons why God tells us to do and not do certain things.
Christians will argue; "Well I don't see the harm in teaching my little ones about Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny." Of course they don't. To their carnal minds the commandment of God to "Learn NOT THE WAY OF THE HEATHEN" has little or no effect on their attempt to worship God as they please.
When you see the "SIN in sin" and start to hate sin as God hates sin, then and only then will you make progress in eliminating these things in your life. Of course, you know, when I say such things it means that God is bringing this about in your thinking and God is enabling you to have to the power to actually conquer these pulls of the flesh. All we who have had a measure of success in victory over sin to the point that sin "no longer has DOMINION over us" (Rom. 6:8-19), desired to be free from sin LONG BEFORE IT EVER ACTUALLY CAME ABOUT! I believe that most of my readers will say "A-men" to that!
Be patient and do not stop crying out to God for deliverance, for in time God will grant you the fruit of righteousness.
God be with you,
Ray
Hope this gives you some hope in the matter...
Peace...Mark
musicman:
Wow, that is a tough one. Now, it's been well over a year for me comitting the act, and being in a relationship and my age of 41 contributes a lot. We won't get into my sins at the moment even though I feel I am married to my girl in God's eyes. But we aren't even to have impure "thoughts" about another. So just not doing this act won't free one from sin. Now I remember the shame I felt the first time I really performed the act successfully. I didn't really even believe in God back then. But I told my-self that I would never ever do it again. That evening I went against my weak assertion and I felt so guilty (until the next morning). I then heard someone say that you can do it 100 times only and remain pure. So two weeks later I felt ever soooooo ashamed when I hit number 101. Anyway, the urges drop significantly with age but I suggest you marry a nice girl and stay with her. Hopefully she is as interested in sex as my girl. Best of luck.
Extol:
Brother Alex,
The heart is deceitful above all things, and is exceedingly weak... (Jer. 17:9)
The sin of lust comes out of our hearts, and that's what drives us to pornography and masturbation. Even if we stopped these habits, our hearts could be just as lustful. We could give up porn and masturbation completely, and still covet our neighbor's wife.
I am a regrettable example of this. Since I got married two years ago, my experiences with porn and masturbation have been greatly reduced (though not entirely eliminated). HOWEVER, I still lust just as badly as at any point in my entire life. And sadly, it is not only women that I see regularly (at my job, for instance.) I find myself thinking of girls I used to be attracted to and haven't seen for 10 years or more, and wondering what they might look like, etc. It is shameful.
So...I could move out in the wilderness by myself, far away from any female, with no access to porn, and tie my hands and crotch so I couldn't masturbate (or even cut off my testicles), and it still wouldn't do a bit of good, because there would still be lust in my heart. What does that prove to me? It proves that of myself I can do nothing. I'll only overcome the lust when God grants me the SPIRITUAL POWER to do so.
God hasn't given me that victory yet, but I know He will. I dream of that victory often, and think of the future when God will finish His work in me, and in the whole world, for that matter.
You know how we're fascinated by God's amazing achievement when we watch that cell video you posted for us? I feel the same fascination (and gratitude) when I think of what God will do in us--spiritually. Think of all the times we've tried to overcome the lust on our own and couldn't. If GOD can fix that in us, He must be REALLY POWERFUL! And the spiritual wonders that He will do in us are even greater and more beautiful than the physical wonder that is the human body.
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