Rebuke or Love

[sfd]

Hi
how are we to go about dealing with a brother if he proclaims to be a believer and still continue to drink, smoke and swear. One day he told me that he gave up smoking and drinking, but the temptaion is to strong for him.

What is meant with this scripture in Titus. Is this the way I have to deal with him.
Tit 1:10  For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, especially they of the circumcision:
Tit 1:11  Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake.
Tit 1:12  One of themselves, even a prophet of their own, said, The Cretians are always liars, evil beasts, slow bellies.
Tit 1:13  This witness is true. Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith;
Tit 1:14  Not giving heed to Jewish fables, and commandments of men, that turn from the truth.
Tit 1:15  Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
Tit 1:16  They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate.

God bless

[angie]

Hello

I don't believe these scriptures are pertaining to someone who smokes or drinks or even swears. If your friend is trying to stop all of these things, then he has the desire to stop. These are not easy things to cast off, just as anything else 'carnal' is not easy to cast off when we desire to grow in Christ. All of these things take time, it happens for some quicker than others. Be there to listen, support and help if you can, in spirit and in prayer. Provide a listening ear wherever possible and consider some strategies that might help the person to 'overcome' their present difficulties. Perhaps someone who specializes in smoking cessation etc could provide some advice or help too. If the desire and efforts are genuine, with some help from the Lord and his friends, it will happen in time.

Angie
x

[sfd]

Thank you Angie.
Yes you are right in what you say,but what if one are there and it happens again and again. I know tho Lord wants us to forgive 70 x 7 times. If he does it again what then. One can't talk andlisten, talk and listen, talk and listen it is not happening. what then?
SFD

[angie]

...I know tho Lord wants us to forgive 70 x 7 times. If he does it again what then. One can't talk andlisten, talk and listen, talk and listen it is not happening. what then?
SFD

Hi SFD

At the end of the day, regardless of how weak your friend is in the flesh doing these things to himself, you personally don't actually have anything to forgive him for. [Unless he is blowing smoke at you, pouring drink down your throat and offending your sensibilities with swearing or doing these things in your company to the detriment of you and everyone around him.]

We can ONLY offer to assist, the rest must come from your friend. It is hard to watch someone in destuctive behaviour because we WANT to help and it is frustrating when we seem unable to. Perhaps you may have to consider not seeing this person for a time if it affects you in this way, but perhaps ensuring he knows that when he is ready to try again, you will be there to lend support in any way you can and that you will keep him in your prayers.

Hope that helps you

Angie

[orion77]

Hello sfd,

I think it's important for us to remember, that God loved us first while still being an enemy.  This is the way we are to be towards our fellow man.

To be honest with you, I've had better conversations with drinkers and smokers than those who pretentously try to look good in front of others.  The verses you quoted have more to do with the doctrines they profess and teach.  We all do things that are not righteous, and I can't see while still being in this body of flesh, how I could be perfect.

Paul, spoke of this type of thing, that we all deal with,


(Rom 7:15)  For what I work out, I do not know. For what I do not will, this I do. But what I hate, this I do.

(Rom 7:16)  But if I do what I do not will, I agree with the Law, that it is good.

(Rom 7:17)  But now I no longer work it out, but the sin dwelling in me.

(Rom 7:18)  For I know that in me, that is in my flesh, dwells no good. For to will is present to me, but to work out the good I do not find.

(Rom 7:19)  For what good I desire, I do not do. But the evil I do not desire, this I do.

(Rom 7:20)  But if I do what I do not desire, it is no longer I working it out, but the sin dwelling in me.

(Rom 7:21)  I find then the law, when I desire to do the right, that evil is present with me.

(Rom 7:22)  For I delight in the Law of God according to the inward man;

(Rom 7:23)  but I see another law in my members having warred against the law of my mind, and taking me captive by the law of sin being in my members.

(Rom 7:24)  O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

(Rom 7:25)  I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then I myself with the mind truly serve the Law of God, and with the flesh the law of sin.


Hope this helps,

God bless,

Gary

[angie]

Hi Gary

To be honest with you, I've had better conversations with drinkers and smokers than those who pretentously try to look good in front of others.

Me too for sure  and Amen to your scriptural quotes

Angie

[angie]

Hi Bobby,

I myself like a beer or 2 sometimes 3 well ok maybe 4  and I also smoke.

     

Doesn't matter a single jot, we luv ya all the same 

Angie

[YellowStone]

Ditto Angie, Well Said!!

We love ya Bobby!!! 

Yellowstone

[JJ]

Hey Bobby,
At my sister's wedding last wknd, I had one glass of champagne and a few sips of a kaluha drink, made me dizzy immediately! Sat in a room full of second hand smoke for 6 hours and felt rotten for 24 hrs.   I get instant hangover feeling w/o any fun!  So I don't drink or
smoke!  But coming from an old (regretful) baptist, I don't judge you ONE bit for enjoying a beer and smoking.  You are a sweetheart
and we are blessed to have you for our big brother figure!   Love in Christ,  Jayle

[sfd]

BOBBY

Are we not to uplift, encourage and and have fellowship with one another? Thanks to all the beautifull people of this forum that we can have exciting moments and to be there for one another. Thank you all for helping me to help others with the right words of love. But all glory honour and praise be to our Lord Jesus Christ who made all this possible. Guys and girls THANK YOU.
Bobby read Jer 29v11.
Love you in Christ
Stevie